Thursday, August 21, 2014

The other wait....

Sometimes an anomaly becomes a habit and no longer feels out of place. In fact when things go back to normal, that change takes some getting used to.

I dont know how long I lived with my fibroids, but I have lived with irregular periods for 10+ years since college and stress and the advent of all nighters, caffeine and junk food to my diet. 

The fibroids were first discovered with my first pregnancy and removed in July 13 with a laprascopic myomectomy. 

It wasnt until these fibroids were removed and AF resumed gradually that I realized just how much they had been impacting my life.

The horrible lower back pains starting a week before AF, the sore boobs, the cramps all went away. It used to be that I used to take tylenol for strong pain long before my period started. Suddenly I found myself free, of all the pain and symptoms that I had accepted as a part of my life. 

My periods have been very short for the last ten years, and got shorter now lasting maybe 3 days.

Why am I thinking about this? As I wait for AF after stopping progesterone, its weird to be an adult afraid of being caught completely off guard. I have no symptoms preceding AF anymore, it doesnt co-operate and appear on a Sunday like clockwork for years (even if it was 2 or 3 months late, it was always Sunday). 

I dont miss the fibroids and the hurdles they represented in my ttc journey, I dont miss the pain, but I do miss having some warning that AF was going to grace me with her presence.

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